The X-Men have had a cultural impact that few other superhero teams could even come close to rivaling. Created by writer Stan Lee and artist Jack Kirby, Marvel’s Merry Mutants were unleashed on an unsuspecting audience in 1963’s The X-Men #1. While the initial run wasn’t a massive hit at the time, the series attracted a massive audience in 1975 with the introduction of such characters as Storm, Colossus, and, of course, Wolverine. Since then, the X-Men have become one of Marvel Comics’ most enduring franchises, branching off into countless spinoff series, miniseries, and one-shots. The characters have also become popular with mainstream audiences through various animated series, video games, action figures, and hit movies. And now, it’s only a matter of time before the X-Men get their own MCU film.
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But beyond the fan-favorite characters, the Marvel Comics universe is home to an enormous and ever-growing roster of mutants – including some truly weird X-Men. With such a vast array of characters spanning decades of comics, it makes sense that some of Marvel’s mutants are, well, a little on the strange side. In fact, it seems that some mutants can barely be considered superheroes and were created mostly for comedic, and sometimes tragic, effect. Below are five of the most bizarre X-Men to ever grace the pages of Marvel Comics.
Goldballs
When the X-Men split up in the wake of the “Schism” storyline, Cyclops formed his own team of X-Men and recruited a young mutant named Fabio Medina, aka Goldballs. The character had a pretty unique superpower (if you can even call it “super”) that allowed him to produce and launch large, golden, bouncy balls from his body. As expected, his abilities didn’t offer much tactical use in Cyclops’ more aggressive X-Men team, but he did take on more narrative importance during Jonathan Hickman’s House of X and Powers of X storylines, wherein it’s revealed that his gold balls could be used to resurrect fallen mutants.
One wonders what went through the minds of Goldballs’ creators Brian Michael Bendis and Chris Bachalo when they came up with the idea for the character. Goldballs was such a joke both on the page and among readers that it’s a miracle he lasted as long as he has. Luckily, writer Jonathan Hickman was able to elevate his abilities, making him slightly more useful than just the person you’d pick first in a game of dodgeball.
Beak
In Marvel Comics, mutations generally lead to enhanced abilities. Not in the case of poor Beak, real name Barnell Bohusk. Created by writer Grant Morrison and artist Ethan Van Sciver, Beak debuted in New X-Men #117 as a mutant who has a beak, small wings, and patchy feathers. He was a student at the Xavier Institute, but because his mutation left him with little more than looking like a frail, humanoid bird, he never officially moved up the ranks to X-Man. However, he proved to be of more use in the X-Men offshoot, the Exiles, who he embarked on all kinds of zany multiversal adventures with.
There’ve been plenty of X-Men with bird-based powers, most of which have proven to be quite useful in battle. But what makes Beak so weird is that his mutation has given him the physical qualities of a bird, but almost no utility. He can glide short distances, but he can’t fly, and he’s got talon-like hands and feet, but they’re barely more useful than knives. However, he’s a heck of a sweet guy, so at least he got to live happily ever after with fellow mutant, Angel Salvadore (who, funnily enough, actually can fly).
Glob Herman
Glob Herman made his grand debut in New X-Men #117, and was created by Grant Morrison and Ethan Van Sciver. As a student of the Xavier Institute, he joined Kid Omega’s Omega Gang, with whom he caused all manner of trouble before being sorted out by the elder X-Men and sent to Africa to help those in need. Glob would eventually return, and become a member of various X-Men teams, including reuniting with other fan-favorite characters in the 2019 New Mutants series.
Based on appearances alone, Glob is one of the most unusual looking characters on this list. His skeleton and innards are completely exposed, as they are covered by a pink, translucent wax outer form. While he does have increased strength and durability, his body is very flammable, which makes him a liability in battle. Seriously, it’s like Morrison and Van Sciver threw a bunch of random traits together to create Glob Herman.
Skin
Skin, whose real name was Angelo Espinosa, first appeared in The Uncanny X-Men #317 as an ex-gang member who faked his own death to get away from his criminal past. He soon joined the group of teenage mutant superheroes, Generation X, learning how to harness abilities under the tutelage of Banshee and Emma Frost.
Now, about those abilities. The poor guy was stricken with a mutation that gave him six extra feet of skin that he could manipulate, deform, and wrap around objects. It’s not a bad ability to have in battle, but it did give him a less-than-attractive appearance; his skin had a greyish tint, and the excess skin made him look almost as if he was melting.
Bailey Hoskins
Bailey Hoskins was an ordinary teenager until he discovered that he was a mutant. With dreams of becoming a superhero, he quickly enrolls at Xavier’s School for Gifted Youngsters. However, it’s there that he discovers how weird and ultimately useless his superpower is, which is the ability to self-detonate – once. That’s right, if Bailey used his powers, it would destroy not only who or what was around him, but it would kill him, as well.
Bailey’s story is told in the appropriately-titled miniseries, X-Men: Worst X-Man Ever. It’s kind of a sad story, as the readers follow a mutant who’s even an outcast amongst other mutants. Despite his destructive power that could really come in handy against a powerful foe, to use it would be suicide. However, the story ends with him taking a stand against a reality-warping mutant – without using his explosive abilities, becoming a hero, of sorts, on his own terms.
What are some other weird X-Men? Sound off in the comments below!
