A popular Internet meme featuring NBA Hall of Famer Michael Jordan was just brought to life in the pages of Absolute Batman. Michael Jordan may be retired from the NBA, but that hasn’t stopped social media users from including him in their Internet memes. One meme in particular pokes fun at how Jordan hates to lose at anything competitive, even if it benefits children. Jordan’s alleged stance on kids has become a running joke online, and now Bruce Wayne’s version of the Dark Knight in DC’s Absolute Universe seems to have adopted that philosophy as well. WARNING: Spoilers for Absolute Batman #6 below.
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Absolute Batman #6 comes from the creative team of Scott Snyder, Nick Dragotta, Frank Martin, and Clayton Cowles. It brings Batman‘s fight against Black Mask to a dramatic end, while also setting up some evil threats for the future in the form of Absolute Joker and Bane. However, it’s Batman’s confrontation with Black Mask and his gang of Party Animals that we’re focusing on today. After getting Penguin to drop him off on a boat storing Black Mask’s servers, Batman begins fighting members of the Party Animals. After roughing them up one by one, Batman tosses them over the boat with a life raft to help them float. Beating up adults is one thing, but Batman also has to contend with fighting little kids who have taken up Black Mask’s evil cause.
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Not one to be deterred, Batman easily stops a kid who attacks him wielding a knife. Batman picks the kid up by the back of his head, all while the kid swings the knife and cusses at him. “What are you… stop, man,” the kid says. “I’m just a kid. You can’t!” Batman glares silently at the kid before casually dropping and punting the kid high in the air before he falls into the water. Yes, you heard that right.
Batman kicks kids.
Batman Mimics Michael Jordan “F*ck Them Kids” Meme
The genesis of the Michael Jordan meme dates back to 2016 and a friendly shooting competition between Michael Jordan and another NBA player, Chris Paul, at a summer camp for kids. They played a one-on-one game against each other, with Paul raising the stakes with a friendly bet that if Jordan missed a shot, he’d have to give the kids at the camp free sneakers. As you can imagine, Jordan took this personally and succeeded in making every shot he took, resulting in no free shoes for the kids.
Fast forward to 2018, when a user on X (formerly Twitter) posted a black-and-white photo of Jordan’s face with the phrase, “F*ck them kids”. The image is meant to serve as an inspirational poster, but instead, it’s turned into a hilarious meme that people online have used time and time again.
Michael Jordan isn’t the only celebrity to be used in the meme. Anakin Skywalker actor Hayden Christensen has had his face plastered with the “F*ck them kids” catchphrase on social media, with the images referencing Anakin Skywalker’s dark turn as Darth Vader when he slaughtered innocent Padawans at the Jedi Temple in Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith.
Absolute Batman Is One of DC’s Most Unpredictable Comics
Scott Snyder and Nick Dragotta are delivering a masterclass in storytelling in Absolute Batman. The changes they’re making to Batman’s mythos are unique and interesting. Some of the changes we’ve seen include killing Thomas Wayne and leaving Martha Wayne alive, Bruce Wayne growing up with members of Batman’s rogues gallery, turning Alfred Pennyworth into an international spy with no association to the Wayne Family, and more.
The changes to Batman’s rogues gallery may be the most compelling. There is the question of whether Riddler, Penguin, Two-Face, Killer Crock, and Catwoman will remain on the straight-and-narrow, or will they revert to their villainous ways like in the main DC Universe. And even past that group, there is the threat of Joker and Bane looming on the horizon. The epilogue to Absolute Batman #6 teased both Absolute Joker and Absolute Bane. While we have yet to see Bane, what we saw of the Joker is an absolutely terrifying image.
Absolute Batman #6 is on sale now.
